quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize