porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
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