it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
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