WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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