Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
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