i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
