he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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