I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
