Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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