also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
