are you still at the devil's house?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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