We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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