My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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