think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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