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Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
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