Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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