Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
