I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
