I like my sex mixed with concussions.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize