I don't think brook has ever known best
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
