HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I think we might need a safe word for this...
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
