I love black thongs
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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