I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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