the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
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Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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