I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
