he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize