my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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