Those balls look pretty dangerous.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
