On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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