We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
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then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
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There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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