So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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