Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
