So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
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I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
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Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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