I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
