We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
