I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize