Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
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