She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
