I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
