I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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