Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
this just has baby written all over it
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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