i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
