adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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