You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
He kissed a someone with a penis
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
