Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
