even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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