"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
