I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
