Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
