I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
