I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
My day in three words: secret purse cake
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
