i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Life without a bra equals bliss.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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